Suffer World by IZFernor and Henry James Smith

Oh no. Part of me doesn't even want to upload this as it's probably the most pathetic, hacked out thing I've made; even more so than some of the early split material or Faith in Modern Mother. It's a "collaboration" between my music persona and my writing persona on a drunken binge of self-loathing, self-pittying, caustic attempts at... something. This is when I had the revelation that I'd just wasted two years of my life on something I should have intervened with so much earlier. Instead of rectifying it I was trying to break everything down into something easily digestible with the guise of... artistry? dumbassery? Hard to say, was so drunk while making all of this that it's hard to tell what I was trying to do in the first place. It's so muddled with passive aggressiveness and obscure shout-outs and references and even though most of the tracks are less than a minute or two long they all feel like they could be shorter. I sort of appreciate what I was trying to do by making something in the moment of inconsolability but it was so poorly executed that it's hard to look in the eye.
I lost my voice even while recording this so the second half is whispered. Working third shift and waiting on injury checks, making petty change as an artist model. Interesting times.

I've always been like this.

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