Your Heart from 모두 살아 (EVERYONE, LIVE) by Cecily Renns

NOTES FROM BIDDY:

This was the first track I finished mixing for the album. I don't know why? Uh, it's a track 3 not counting the intro, so in the Cecily album schema that means it's the single. So it makes sense.

The guitar in this is my bari, in, like... drop A flat? Some insane drop tuning that sounded great with a highpass filter on it. It was like, there we go, SHOEGAZE!!!!!!!

I also played recorder and mandolin for a section in the bridge. I felt like this song's nostalgic themes merited some pastoralism. 'Course, I'm white and American, so my idea of pastoralism is half Renaissance and half Simon and Garfunkel.

Cecily Commentary:

This track is strongly inspired by "We Shine at Night" by Parannoul compositionally. I couldn't really replicate the baggy stuff but the piano rock sound is there. This was one of the first songs I wrote for the album, but also one I considered cutting until Bridgette turned it into something really good. My demo sounded pretty empty and it didn't have that Parannoul-esque productional edge.

Lyrically, this takes influence from Parannoul and Shinsei Kamattechan's work and also Yorushika's albums. There is a line about quitting your part time job and running away with your bike. This never happened to me, however it is a reference to the Yorushika song "Hachigatsu, Bou, Tsukiakari". I wanted to capture that feeling nostalgia, bittersweetness, powerlessness, and self hate.

I can't even ride a bike.

The hook came to me out of nowhere one day, it was weird. It became the whole basis for the song. I think what this song is missing is a bridge, though. But I'm pretty anal about my song lengths and I didn't want this song to be longer than 3 minutes.

Fun fact (and some context as to why Bridgette said this is track 3) the tracklist was originally Everyone Live - Alien - Your Heart, but I switched them out after I heard this version. Funnier fact is when I wrote it, I wrote it as the song that would follow the title track anyway, so it was always meant to be that.

Tracklist

3.	Your Heart	3:40

Lyrics

한밤중에 산책을 했어
노을이 뜨면서 네 생각을 했어
너도 나와 같이 있었다면

알바 하다가 도망갔어
자전거 타면서 난 계속 울었어
너가 마지막으로 했던 말
하늘을 보면서 생각났어

너의 그런 심정이 내게 닿았었다면
나도 무언가 다르게 하지 않았을까
날은 지나고 스무살이 되면서
나는 집으로 돌아갔던거야

7년이 지났는데도
아직 아무 것도 이루지 못했어
내 친구들은 날 앞서가고
나는 아직 방구석에 있네
밴드도 하고싶었지
무대 설 수 있다면 무엇이든 할텐데
친구들의 호의만 낭비해
그래서 이딴 노래만 쓰네

너의 그런 심정이 내게 닿았었다면
나도 무언가 다르게 하지 않았을까
날은 지나고 스무살이 되면서
나는 집으로 돌아갔던거야

날 없애고
원하는대로
분해시켜
내 마음을

-

I went on a walk at night
As the sun rose, I thought about you
Only if you were here with me

I ran away from my part time job
I kept crying as I rode my bike
What you said to me the last time
I thought about it while looking at the sky

If those feelings of yours had reached me
Maybe I would have done something different
The days pass and I became 21
I went back home

Seven years went by
I still haven’t achieved anything
My friends have surpassed me
And I’m still in my room alone

I wanted to be in a band
If I could stand on stage, I’d do anything
I have wasted my friends’ good will
So I write this kind of shitty song

If those feelings of yours had reached me
Maybe I would have done something different
The days pass and I became 21
I went back home

Fade me away
And do as you will
Break down
My heart

Credits

from 모두 살아 (EVERYONE, LIVE), released November 3, 2023

License

CC BY-SA 3.0. See the Creative Commons website for details.