Rockin' History by V/R: Various Rockers

[BL012]
by Various Rockers

Historical Variété Rock

So ~ You think you know Rock n' Roll ?

You stand there all smug, with your BUDDY HOLLY, WithYour ESQUERITA, WENDY O. WILLIAMS your BO DIDDLY - You Don't know Diddly - You Need to learn ROCKING HISTORY -

A Lot of people say that ROCKING HISTORY Starts with the BEATLES. Sure, Some will switch out the BEATLES for the Rolling Stones, or the LED ZEPPLIN, or some other bloated AOR corpse from days gone by, they might even dare to mention BOB DYLAN or HUEY LOUIS AND THE NEWS - Maybe BILLY JOEL will be mentioned ( But god, I hope not ) - You cannot overlook " Seminal " bands either, supich as BLACK SABBATH or THE SHAGGS - Why, just moments ago I was talking about ALICE COOPER - But that's nothing to get too worried about, as I referenced GG ALLIN in the same breath. Speaking of breathing, many people cite KENNY G as one fo the most amazing musicians of the era - But as MILES DAVIS would have you know, that's just not the case -

BURT BACHARACH, THE SEX PISTOLS - AC/DC - BOSTON - ZZ TOP

Let's not forget about JANIS JOPLIN, KISS, METALLICA or STRYPER either - It's not hard to admit that they rock pretty hard ~! But still, regardless - They have no bearing whatsoever on ROCKING HISTORY_

FRIGID PINK - DEF LEOPARD - KISS - PINK - BLUE OYSTER CULT

Why, you can even think about TENACIOUS D, GUNS n' ROSES, WAR, LOTHAR AND THE HAND PEOPLE , MORTIS, CARLOS SANTANA, BANANARAMA, - These figures loom large over the landscape. - But the Mount Rushmore Of ROCKING HISTORY ? Friends, ( And possible lovers ) that history ain't even yet begin to be writ -

EMINIM - THE BOOMTOWN RATS - BLONDIE - THE CLASH - CCR

Look Out - It's KC AND THE SUNSHINE BAND, FLAMING LIPS, THE CARPENTERS, HAWKWIND , DEVO - Pikers, I say - Dilettantes - Even acts like HANSON, 2 LIVE CREW, MEGADEATH, THE DONNAS, and JUDAS PREIST cannot hold a candle. And never mind the spin off bands - The solo acts, the reunion tours.

FRANKIE GOES TO HOLLYWOOD - GRACE JONES - TOM JONES

So what does it mean to make ROCKING HISTORY ? Well, you'd have to ask ELVIS PRESLEY or BLOOD, SWEAT & TEARS or THREE DOG NIGHT or OASIS - These titans of industry would have some insight, some glimpses of the rich treasure trove / compost heap that is ROCKING HISTORY -

LORDE - THE SLEAFORD MODS - FLOCK OF SEAGULLS - SAXON

But enough of that - Let me leave you with this - Forget everything you have already heard, It's outdated - Irrelevant. History begins in this moment, and ROCKING HISTORY Starts right here, right now -

Thank you for being a part of it ~!


The Author would like to thank the WORLDS LOUDEST VACUME CLEANER ad on Craigslist for serving as a template for the above Hyperbole





This Album was created expesciallly for BROMTOL LARGESSE ~ It was designed using the sounds of the artists listed below & assembled by {AN} EeL ~


Cover Image / Text : Bromtol Largesse